I am still pro chivalry.
I think it is appropriate for men to open doors for women.
I think the mantra "women and children first" is worth perpetuating.
I think there are alot of women out there who appreciate a man who is a MAN.
I don't view men who snivel and whine and make excuses for themselves as Real Men.
I'm not saying a man should never get a pedicure, or should never weep. I am certainly not saying they should not do dishes or housework. Many manly young men are artistic. They'd rather paint than play football. Or play music rather than work on their big ole truck.
Boys need to learn to do a man's work. They need to learn to chop wood and haul debris. They need to learn to accept responsibility for their actions. They need to learn how to be leaders. They need to learn how to be strong and steady for the women in their lives. They need to be dependable. And, YES. They need to change diapers and walk a colicky baby to sleep for hours in the middle of the night so their beloved can sleep a little.
Isn't CHARACTER the measure of a man? So we need to make sure we teach our boys to do hard things, things that challenge and stretch them -- things that build character. We need to comfort and cuddle them when they are little and be there for them as they grow. But we also have to let them suffer some hard knocks. We need to encourage and foster relationships with their fathers. And we need to realize that we will have to cut the apron strings, whether it is sending them outside to make bows and arrows out of sticks and branches and build forts, or to go fishing on a boat with their buddies (when they are old enough) while you worry all day that they will capsize. Maybe they will be turned down for a date by a girl they like, or not be accepted by a group of friends they'd like to be part of. We have to let them go through hard times, make mistakes, and accept the responsibility for them.
We need to PRAY!
I heard this song awhile back and it made me chuckle...(you'll have to turn off the tunes on my sidebar to listen to this)
When you see a deer you see Bambi
and I see antlers up on the wall.
When you see a lake you think picnics
and I see a large mouth up under that log.
You're probably thinkin' that you're gonna change me.
In some ways, well, maybe you might.
Scrub me down, dress me up, oh but no matter what
remember I'm still a guy.
When you see a priceless French painting
I see a drunk naked girl.
You think that riding a wild bull sounds crazy
and I'd like to give it a whirl.
Well, love makes a man do some things he ain't proud of
and in weak moment I might --
walk your sissy dog,
hold your purse at the mall --
but remember I'm still a guy.
I'll pour out my heart, hold your hand in the car,
write a love song that makes you cry.
Then turn right around knock some
jerk to the ground
'cuz he copped a feel as you walk by.
I can hear you now talkin' to your friends sayin',
"Yeah girls he's come a long way
from draggin' his knuckles and carryin' a club
and buildin' a fire in a cave."
But when you say a back rub means only a back rub
then you swat my hand when I try.
Well now what can I say - at the end of the day,"Honey, I'm still a guy."
And I'll pour out my heart, hold your hand in the car,
write a love song that makes you cry.
Then turn right around knock some jerk to the ground
'cuz he copped a feel as you walk by.
These days there's dudes gettin' facials,
manicured, waxed and botoxed.
With deep spray-on tans and creamy lotiony hands
you can't grip a tackle box.
Yeah, with all of these men linin' up to get neutered
it's hip now to be feminized.
I don't highlight my hair,
I've still got a pair.
Yeah, honey I'm still a guy.
Oh my eyebrows ain't plucked there's a gun in my truck. Oh thank god, I'm still a guy.
9 comments:
I totally agree!!! AMEN TO THIS POST! We constantly talk with my son about holding doors for women, girls...look for opportunities to give a hand and help a lady.
God made men and women different..we have our own unique qualities...I am glad it's my husband who has to go down with the baseball night after hearing a noise downstairs..not me!
-sandy toe
I agree mostly with your post as with the character part, however just like women, men are all different and sometimes their character may not be holding doors, but something like sharing a partnership with you, and respecting your feelings above all else. Let's face it ladies, we all like a door opened for us, but flattery is almost like skin deep, if a man goes home and runs all the big stuff like money and child rearing without regard to the wife's feelings what good is all that flattery, I have seen this a lot. What I like about your post is the idea that a real man values and respects his wife, that is so important, but let's remeber that a true partner goes beyond even changing a diaper, not that that isn't important, I think a real man respects his wife and her character and doesn't expect her to be the little housewife he opens doors for. I feel blessed that I myself have a good man, but have seen this male in a lot of husbands and its hard to watch friends go through real life with it. Good post!
Very good post... and timely for me. I'm struggling about what to do with my son hitting. Specifically a girl. It's not tolerated, but nothing is getting through. He's 3, so dad can't take him out back and whollop him for it. Any ideas?
Thanks, friend.
This song cracks me up!
I love it.
I agree with it this post, too.
I'm old fashioned and blush at manly man. My husband is a computer man but can chop wood, play any sport and stand up for his woman along with the rest of the big boys. I prefer him this way than soft and girly.
His character is indeed wired to protect and provide. I'm thankful for my man.
Shouldn't be just a "man" thing. Why not train all of our children to encompass these traits??
I agree with you! I hope to one day raise a son who will become a man! For now I will work on the girls :)
I am married to that man. He is strong for me and for our family. He is a terrific example of taking care of his family. Even does the dishes every night. He's changed diapers, cleaned up vomit that waited for me. (I vomit at the sight of vomit, poor guy). He will never be one to tinker under a car or chop wood and that is okay with me. However I have been known to say on may occassions that these hands are to soft to be a man's hands. LOL
Good post. You left out boys will be boys. I say let'em. It's often hard to find the balance between being men and being criticized by the world around us for being men. We walk the fine line of values like, don't fight/defend yourself. Or, be the provider/work-aholic. Our choice are not always black and white. I totally agree with being whole partners. Changing diapers, crying if your sad, opening doors, stopping for the woman with a flat. I work on my car, do home repairs, apply acrylic nails, sew. Oops my secret is out.
SuperDave, I know some girls you have raised and I know your lady too. Yes, you are a real man, in both the tender and the tough ways.
One of my friends told me recently that her hubby belongs to a group called SMACK. It stands for Straight Men Also Crochet and Knit. heehee. So I am sure you can qualify with the nails too. In fact, maybe you should start your own Google group.
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